I made this song personal to me because they were the words I desperately needed and wanted to hear.
It was the fall of 2005 that my husband got a call to be apart of a work project in Minnesota and with it came the opportunity for a temporary move. Being a “military brat”, I looked forward to the challenge and change. After all it was going to be for only three months, so I thought. Why I didn’t Google anything about Minnesota is beyond me! At the time we had two small toddlers and we were about to enter into the frozen tundra, where Hell can freeze over.
While trapped indoors to survive the longest and coldest winter I’d ever experienced I became desperate for relationship. I longed for more but did not know exactly what the more was. I now realize that winter season was not just the weather but also my spiritual season at that time.
With a Bible, sketchbook, and an old hymnal, I began to embrace a faith I really only knew through the eyes of others. It was in my quiet times with God that He began playing the soundtrack of my life on the surface of my heart. As I would hear familiar tunes being recalled, I began putting little sketches down into my journal and would rewrite lyrics into prayers. I was open to wanting to know more of who God was and who He could be for me. I was a wounded woman who was very guarded in relationships but desperately longed to be seen and desired by others. The stone I had built around my heart wouldn’t allow me to trust and was rarely vulnerable with anyone. The battle waging within my heart was the desire for community and connection, but my fear brought separation and sadness.
As I pull out this journal and take a walk down memory lane with you a rush of emotion comes to my heart. Inside, glued, are the lyrics to the song, “Have a Little Faith in Me“. This was a song that I heard God singing over me while inviting me into an intimate relationship with Him. I rewrote some of the words like “baby” to say, “My daughter”. I made this song personal to me because they were the words I desperately needed and wanted to hear. My most favorite lyrics in the song are, “When your secret heart Cannot speak so easily Come here darlin From a whisper start To have a little faith in me”. I needed that invitation to begin to open my heart to Him and begin my journey of TRUST.
Faith is a difficult word to live because it means you have to trust. Trusting someone often requires submitting or surrendering your will to them, and that’s just scary! It’s a willingness to allow others in, opening your heart and life to them. Does the Scripture mean nothing to you that says, “The Spirit that God breathed into our hearts is a jealous Lover who intensely desires to have more and more of us”? But he continues to pour out more and more grace upon us. For it says, God resists you when you are proud but continually pours out grace when you are humble.” So then, surrender to God. Stand up to the devil and resist him and he will turn and run away from you. Move your heart closer and closer to God, and he will come ever closer and closer to you… -James 4:5-8a (TPT) God was letting me know that in order for me to trust others I was going to have to learn to humble my self-protecting, prideful heart and learn to trust Him first.
As the song came to the end and the tears flowed down my face, the lyrics played, “I said I will hold you up, I will hold you up”. These words came with a promise as I rewrote the next line in the song to say, “My strength is enough for you”. But he answered me, “My grace is always more than enough for you, and my power finds its full expression through your weakness, – 2 Corinthians 12:9 (TPT)
God is always asking us to have a little faith in Him. Faith the size of a mustard seed can move mountains and heal hearts. When you need a shift, a renewing, a friend, or a Savior you should ask yourself, “Can I Have a Little Faith In Him?”.